Sunday, July 11, 2010

Never mind the title

So, I began working last week. It's been almost two weeks. And I don't have as much to complain about as I thought I would. Or would like to. But there is one issue that I would like to address. During my seven legal internships in Bangalore and 2 weeks of employment, I've noticed different styles of work, different vibes. Some firms have a predominantly national law schools crowd, some have a predominantly bangalore university crowd, some have young energetic partners who interact with everyone, some have partners who are the proverbial "blue moon/ id ka chand". Some have an awesome work ethic, some not so much. Some treat interns like one of them, some treat them like the poor cousin. Each of them is different, in a hundred different ways. But over the years I've noticed an alarming similarity among every one of them- they all have, in one corner, the passive aggressive-nearly always avoiding confontation yet getting things their way- disapproving- Real Estate Aunty.

No, I am not being supercilious because I am a corporate lawyer and think we're a cut above. I do think the second is true, but that is not the reason for this classification.

There is a type- a very dangerous type- and it exists. In one corner of the office, unnoticeable behind a computer and a fortress of patta deeds in Kannada/Telegu/Tamil, there lives a real estate aunty. She ALWAYS exhibits the following traits:

  1. Aged between 33-45.
  2. Has a kid between the ages of 8 and 15
  3. Full strong Karnataka accent
  4. Will begin eyeing the clock at 12 and will break for lunch latest at 12:45 (much before the corporate team or the poor litigation guys who only eat after 2:30)
  5. Drives a Kinetic/Activa. No Dio mind you because its obviously not fuel efficient enough or sturdy enough.
  6. Has a name like Savita, Sujata, Vinita.

Real estate aunties will also exhibit the following behavioural characteristics:

  1. They do not approve of your dressing. And god forbid, if you wear skirts, your legs will get the staring down of a lifetime.
  2. They WILL NOT allow you to switch on the fan. And they haven't even heard of an AC. They always feel cold and will always carry a jacket (reebok, polo sport) to work. Yes Bangalore has pleasant weather, but it isn't frikkin South of England.
  3. Their sister-in-law/cousin/aunt twice removed will always be having a child.
  4. At around 4:30 they will receive a phone call from their child/children and will proceed to help them with their homework. Thereafter the constant chatter will be interrupted with "Bee-Yaa-Yell-Yell", "aah, haudu,haudu. Correct appa."
  5. They will mispronounce names-"Gowtham, Kowshik, Gowrav"
  6. Their wallpapers will always, always be flowers/teddy bears/some supposedly cute animal thing.
  7. At 6:00 pm they will promptly pack their bags and leave.
Really, I could go on, but you get the picture.


  1. Really, do go on!

    Do they also send email forwards with "cute" pics of soft toys, pets and babies?

  2. oh my god, yes they you know some?

  3. I know the type. I used to be surrounded by them! Except that they were not corporate lawyers. And not all were 35-45, some were even 24. Some were even guys.

    I think "Real Estate Aunties" is more than a demographic classification. It is a state of being.

  4. Yeah, these aren't corp either. ThankfullY! I'm tellin ya corp lawyers aren't like this.
    But I agree with you. It is a state of mind.
    So what type of uncle are you?

  5. I was shocked out of my life when I went to my mother's office and discovered she has Mehrangarh fort and camel pics as "screensaver". Forget pink teddy bears.

    Whattosayy...all the best :)

  6. One who is suppressing at least three lawyer jokes right now. (oops!)

    Wait a minute, is this one of those questions that incriminate you no matter what you say? Like when my mom asks me what kind of malted milk drink i want. single malt whiskey isnt really an option, is it?

    (tiny voice in the head : do i really want to be getting into an argument with a lawyer?!)

  7. yes aa? but i never sawed such an aunty! firms i worked in always had supercilious/bored/chatty english speaking grads. whatta bore!

    so all this patta storing and all happens in the firm itself? why she has patta andall? sorry, confusion is happening.

    most importantly - i figured out 'houdu' means 'yes' very late during my blore i'ship! i used it freely, recklessly and confidently. no wonder i kept getting off at different (wrong) bus stops every day. :(

  8. Lol, you've really got the stereotypes very accurately!